Fooling myself….

I had believed that I was budgeting and managing my money.  I think I was just fooling myself.  I was probably doing it on a higher level.  Things really hit home Tuesday night when I went grocery shopping.  I had a list of things that I wanted and I wanted to spend no more then $100.  I had mentally budgeted $100 for groceries, $100 for vet bill and then would have some change left over for anything else I needed.  Since it was very important to me to not spend much more then $100 on groceries I kept a running tally in my head on how much I had spent.  I got half way through the store and realized that I had more things on my list then I had money.  That was when I started prioritizing.  I will not argue that some of my priorities were out of whack.  Top priority was my birthday dinner, second milk, juice and cheese.  The third was cat food but I passed on cat litter.  I chose instead to buy beer and coke.  I bought a book instead of buying tv dinners.  I know I know my priorities weren’t really in line.  I realized that I have been fooling myself thinking I was budgeting….really I was buying whatever the heck I wanted and then trying to make it work.  I vow to do more of the budgeting and less of the making it work.  I know I can do this.  It is going to suck but in the long run it is for the better.  *sigh*

Gaining the edge

I think my finances are starting to turn the corner.  I have set up all of my bills for the month and got the company land line/dsl up to date.  I was getting all ready to pay the cell phone bill and realized that I needed to book my flight for Thanksgiving.  On the plus side I had the money to take care of that and the rental loan payment and not pull from savings for the rest of the month.  On the double plus side my parents gave me for my birthday round trip airfare.  I suspect they will reimburse at Thanksgiving.  That should help with Christmas gifts and get my enough space on a credit card to pay for the hotel room on my next business trip.  Tonight is grocery shopping and I think I have my list in line to spend under $100.  I sure hope so because tomorrow is the cat’s vet visit and I am just not sure what that will cost.    Last year it came to about $100.  I can handle both of those with a little spare room.  If I am really good I will get my health savings account money moved in and it will give me some space for next week.

 

My manta must be if I live like no one else later I will be able to live like no one else and

Love with your heart not your wallet.

Money stayed in wallet!

Yesterday I went to a Women’s event at the church.  As is often true they had a table selling books, t-shirts, cd’s and note cards.  I volunteered at the table so I had the opportunity to check everything out and be exposed to it for awhile.  In the past I would have purchased at least the book and the t-shirt if not the cd and notecards too.  The t-shirt would join the rest of the shirts I had picked up at things like this.  The book would join the other books and the cd would lay on my desk.  I ran through this all in my head and watched it mentally playout.  I then decided to not buy anything.  The true bonus to it all is they gave me a t-shirt as a thank you.  That makes it special.  On another note I stopped by Goodwill after the event and found a mirror I like for the front hall for all of $6.00!

Finding ways to cure desires………

I managed a brief cure to my desire to spend money.  I went to the dollar store on Friday.  I allowed myself 7 things.  I also wanted to make sure that I bought a couple of glass containers so I could start experimenting with Christmas gifts.  As soon as I walked in I found these absolutely adorable containers and some super cute sunflowers just the next aisle over.  I was building the bouquet in my hands when I remembered.  I have $7 to spend in this store.  I have priorities.  No matter how cute this bouquet would be and how great it would look on the mantle piece it took priority behind the glass jars.  If I couldn’t find the glass jars then maybe I could buy these.  I found the glass jars and bought 2 of each type.  I also came across some plastic salt and pepper shakers that would be perfect for the screened in porch so I snagged them.  I came across a light bulb that I needed for my scentsy so I snagged that.  At least I hope it will work.  I haven’t used it yet.  I completed my purchases with a table clothe for the Thanksgiving table.  Just the sense of perusing the store fed my need.  I went home and contemplated whether I needed the bookshelf in my office.  I determined I could get away with out and it might actually be an improvement.  So I am moving the bookshelf into Beloved’s office and will be satisfied.  I measured my plastic shelving and came up with an option for the suitcases in the basement.  I will explore that tonight.  In the mean time I read a great article on Get Rich Slowly that talked about Craig’s list shopping.  I figure I will check out Craig’s List and Freecycle every day.  I will start a list of things I would like and when I find what I want on those sources I will acquire.  I need to get into the mentality that I don’t need it NOW.  I am also starting to make my crafts for Christmas.  I am working first on things that I already have the supplies for and trying to see how much I can get done that way.  Maybe the majority.  I want/need it to be a cheap Christmas.  I think I can accomplish that one step at a time.

Struggling to behave

I think the stupid bookshelf is haunting me.  I just keep envisioning how cozy I can make that office.  I don’t like how it looks right now.  A portion of that is because there is stuff strewn everywhere.  There is much I would like to do.  I contemplate the bookshelf.  Just $45 at Walmart….that’s not much is it?  Then I think about the fact that I still owe on my cell phone bill.  Yes I know the company is supposed to pay for that.  This month the company can’t.  There is money due on the company phone/dsl(which I use), the rental property utilities.  The company can’t afford that either.  There is the loan payment on the rental property.  The company can’t afford that either.  I need to buy a ticket for Thanksgiving to see my family.  I can’t afford that.  There is nothing in my emergency fund and I need newer tires.  My credit cards and line of credit are to the limit.  I can’t justify that bookshelf….even if it is only $45.  But maybe….and the cycle starts again.  I know it is mind over matter.  I know I have the will to defeat it.  I just have to keep doing it…sometimes minute by minute and other times hour by hour.  If I can learn restraint now I can do the things I want later.  Later when I am not worried about when a check will clear and when one will be sent.  Patience.

All spending should be reviewed after paying bills

Yesterday in church I was day dreaming of how we can organize my beloved’s office. A new book shelf, perhaps a chair with a lamp and table in the corner for him to hide away to. I was thinking about shelving in the coat closet for suitcases and maybe even now is the time to go after the wall street journal subscription. I came into work this morning with the plan to spend some money today.

I started with spending my lunch trying to get scrap book pages worked out from the Myrtle Beach trip. Beloved and I had a quick back and forth email on paying a bill. I told him don’t worry about a, b, and c I have them just take care of d. I figured it was time to work out money monday. Last week I squared away most of the utilities and I was fairly up to date on expenditures. I updated what I spent since last monday and then verified that nothing had happened that I didn’t expect.

Then I started figuring out what was left. Mortgage payment made, rest of utilities taken care of, rental property insurance paid. Then discovered that the dsl at home is off. That is supposed to be a company expense but as the company isn’t making any money it became my problem. I tried to squeak out at least part of it’s payments. I noticed money started to run out. I still have the pool closing this weekend and I am not really sure how much that will cost. I am reserving about $400 for that. I really hope it covers because honestly I don’t have much else. I am truly tired of trying to make a dime spread to a quarter. I need to remember to be grateful for the dime.

Needless to say lesson learned once again. Don’t shop until you have paid bills. What you think you have and what you actually have when you are done could vary.

Revisiting….

Life has been so crazy or maybe thinking about what I am doing and where I am at has been too overwhelming. Whichever I will try to be back!

The house has finally passed inspection. I have my occupancy permit! Yeah!!!! I have finally paid off all of the businesses that I used to get through the inspection. Now for pool closing, roof repair and fireplace inspection. In the mean time a bit of pool repair.

I took a huge step in the fact that last month when I booked my trip to Myrtle Beach for the annual family vacation my Dad offered to pay for my flight. I instinctively did what I normally did and said no I can handle it. Then I kicked myself. I am not wonder woman. I don’t need to say I can handle everything. When someone offers to help me, especially financially and I need it, I should take them up on the offer. So I did. I can do this….one step at a time.

Paying attention to your money is like paying attention to your garden

It is truly amazing what paying attention to your money can accomplish. Over the weekend I went a little crazy with my spending. Something I could have done without. I find though that I probably need to do this every so often but what I probably need to do more is to look at my accounts. I have been updating my spreadsheets the last two days trying to figure out my money situation. I don’t have money in some of the places I need it but I basically have enough to cover everything. I get myself in trouble not necessarily because I spend too much but because I tend to stick my head in the sand. When I do that I get into nothing but trouble. When I just tend to my money every so often  similar to tending to my garden it tends to not become overwhelming, is fruitful and makes me happy.

I found a house!!!!

I found the house that I think I want to live in. It has room in all of the places I want to have room. I will have a master bathroom. It is in the area I want to live in. While it is on the higher side of what I wanted to pay the mortgage + taxes + pmi + insurance should be just about what my rent + renters insurance equals. I made an offer 2/13. On 2/14 they counter offered and I countered back. On 2/15 they accepted my counter offer. I still get sick just thinking about it. Now I alternate between excitement and scared. I close April 14th. I am starting to think about painting and how I can make the house my own. Right now I need to focus on getting rid of stuff that doesn’t make me happy and packing. I am glad I can finally focus on that after a month and a half of house hunting. People say that you look for other houses but honestly I haven’t. I am so glad I found something in my price range that meets what I was looking for that I am ready to move on to whatever is next.

I really liked the post on Get Rich Slowly Calling the Shots:How to Be the CEO of your own life. I think I have had to learn to be at least my own CFO to get where I am. Where I am is far above where I used to be and is only going to get better. I need to work on the next step of being the CEO of my own life. Perhaps i can start on reporting the finances to my self.

Big steps for mekind

Over the past few months I have been saving in what used to be my school account for either a car or a super emergency. On the long drive to and from my parent’s house for Christmas I got to thinking about the money I had built up and the dividend check I would be receiving after the first of the year. Last year I used the dividend check to fix the car. The 2 years before that it was a new digital camera and an mp3 player (used).

I have wanted a wii for several years. I figured I could get the wii and use wii fit to lose weight. Everyone seems to love it. If I purchased the wii it wouldn’t be a rash spur of the moment purchase since I have wanted one for at least 2 years. I even went so far as to price wii’s and go to the store to buy it and I wimped out. The wii itself would be $199. The wii fit game if they had it in stock, which they didn’t, would have probably been another $30 plus another $60 for the wii fit board. It would be another $100 – $150 for warranty and another set of controllers. This is all for just one game. Obviously we would want more. It was just too much money for me to spend.

On New Year’s day I looked at how much money I had in the bank and how much my second lowest credit card balance was (the account was closed by the credit card company) and realized that I could pay it off. So I did. A couple of days later I received my dividend deposit. I looked at how much that was and how much I owed on my new second lowest credit card balance (the other account that was closed by the credit card company) and realized that with a little bit more from my mad money account I could pay it off. So I did. I can now proudly say that I don’t owe any money on any accounts that are closed. I am also down from 5 unsecured credit card accounts to 3. Wow! I did it!